:l0v3 m3:

Thursday, August 28 lots of things had happened over the past weekend... i tot i could have handled it well ... but guess not... the whole wide world thinking i am throwing temper ...think that i am a spoilt brat!!! my god... i tot they could have understand me well enough that i am not.... but facts proven that they still do not know me well... sad to say but is true.... i have been asking all ard many ppl.... asking them why am i not been well treated like all other ppl in the company.... i have the best appointment in the whole company BUT what!!! i am the worst ill-treated in the whole company... ppl telling me to put me into their shoes... that they are not any better off... then... is my eyes telling me a lie?? that what i had seen was rubbish and not true???? can someone answer me??? when i flared off... ppl then start to notice my present... what i had been doing... do i need to do this repeatedly over a period of time... sho i will always be well-treated and not ILL-TREATED..... tell me.... do i need to do till this extend??? I have been searching in the company for the correct person to give me the correct answer i yield for long... BUT WHAT!!!! minghui wake up your idea... this whole world is not eloving just ard you... when i put others' interest in front of me.... always think abt them... this is what i get in return... some would have told me this... minghui whatever you do ...dun always ask for a return... YARHS... i know tt... BUT BUT BUT... just can't i be selfish for one time.... just one time... to have someone dotes me... to have someone telling me the correct answer i have been looking for... i asked someone whom i tot IS the CORRECT PERSON, traceson, but is all proven wrong... i tot he would have told me.... "minghui , i understand, you dun need to say anymore.... i really understand" BUT he did not... yet he is reasoning out to me... WHAT GOING ON???? when i tot he would have know me well enough.... and be the correct person... but is wrong... god is laughing at me now.... how??? i am sho upset that i didn't even bother to ask QQ anymore...cos he would have told me the same reasoning...and thinking i am throwing temper... NO ONE.... in the company had put my interest into their heart... why??? tell me why??? I SWEARED to god that for whatever things that i do in the company.... their interest will always be my concern!!! and why are they giving me all these shit??? a phase of "i understand" is it that difficult out from their mouth? GOD just tell me why??? i almost wanted to called kor(bernard) and kenny... telling them all these... but i know they couldn't have help me in anyway... i stand up even more firm .... i am not going to just let this off... i will make them pay for all the harms they did to me.... and i wan it back double.... TOT that QQ, traceson, YQ, jason, stanly, kenneth, chris would have understand me... but they did not.... saddening....god... tell me what should i do now??? why am i always not remembered for good times... for good things.... for enjoyment... INSTEAD.... bad times.... shit times.... suffering times.... i will always be remembered and i am always the first to help them.... i have been crying for sho many days... why no one came forward to me... and telling me what i wan to hear... but instead all giving me reasons and reasons to cover all the harms they had did to me.... the deepest one was traceson and QQ... little did i expect the closest one...to be the one that caused the deepest scar in my heart! I HATE THEM.... for all i did for them.... this is what i get in return.... shit and nothing else.... answer me god... i had just break down... for 19 years of my life during schooling, working.... i am always well-liked , dotes by all the people ard me... never once they had forgotten the existence of me.... kenny, kor(bernard), hui wei and xi jie... always there just to make me laugh when i am upset.... there to let me beat them.... there to lend their listening ears.... amanda, li ling, ellice, janice. benjamin and evan.... never failed to meet me often sho i can always cry out as much as i could ..... aiqi, yunting, yuyi and melissa... always had the KBOX card ready just for me to sing out all my anger, sadness.... WHY CAN'T traceson, QQ, jason, stanly, YQ... just be like them?? a phase of "i understand" is it really that difficult for them to say??? i dun know what i could have do now... all i know is i will be taking a REAL LONG BREAK till i recover... and it wouldn't be any faster.... god save me out from the bottom of the pit... i am falling and falling...and falling... i can never see the bottom...and the sun to rise anymore.... Life hav a balance ~~ posted by x|aO m|nG on 4:12 AM

x|a0m|ng, serving NS now.... very sian! but will still strive on! dream is to become 2009 superstar!!!! - - - - - - - - ME? YES IS ME! name: x|aO m|nG age: is a secret likes: hmmz ... chocolates! wishlist: Teddy bears NS ends faster SCORE WELL get into good company more friends - - - - - - - - EXIT FOR DANGER! LINKYS LINKYS LINKYS LINKYS - - - - - - - - - SHOUT OUT HERE! designed by: Blackey